pockets the hero
by
vxhawk
pockets had never been much of a woodland girl.. her sisters, each of whom she dearly loved, found happines under the gardner loriet's gentel wing, sleeping in flower beds and cooking up a beetlegrub stew on tuesdays. rosie had even struck up a delicate romance with tom the garden gnome. miss pockets however, dreamed of more.. perhaps less.. her heart was that of an adventouror.
one morning a big smelly man with hair in his ears came to the garden and stepped on rosie. tom threw his fishing rod at the meanie but he just got steped on too. perhaps still a little sleepy, the usually quite brave lori got a scared and tried to run away but he ate her and left bits in the fish pond. pockets decided she didnt like him at all so borrowing her sisters (slightly flat) daisy sepel boots and digging out the old penny from under the bramble bush, pockets flew into town to become a hero
'i want to kill the smelly man with hairs in his ears' she said to the ben the blacksmith. hearing the determination in her voice and taking her penny, mr. ben gave her a pretty green apron to keep her safe and warm, further chatter uncovered that 'grendel' the meanie lived in an underwater cave. instead, in the cave, she found a skeleton cleaning behind his ear with a billhook. 'i want to kill the smelly man with hairs in his ears' pockets said to the skeleton. quite alarmed to have been engaged in conversation, the skeleton slipped, skewering its skull on the point of its weapon and apperently hurting itself quite badly. driven into a blinding fury it snatched at our hero determined to squeeze all the breath out of her tummy.. upset and confused she bit her tiny teeth into its finger, the unfortunate skeleton collapsed into a dusty pile of bones leaving only its finger clasped firmley in pockets' maw. she picked up the billhook as to prevent baby skeletons from hurting themselves on it and walked a little deeper into the cave.
around the corner, a heidiouse stench nearly knocked her off her feet. my goodness she thought. the grendel must be close, she straped the oversized billhook to her back in the knot of her apron strings and fluttering into the air, she on pushed down the hole when alas! she bumped quite literly into a wobbely dwarf. 'getsh that peskey pointie outsh of mi face! im hears to kill the grendel!' the drunken dwarf proceded swing at pockets with tankard, trip on his bootlace and pass out cold. a quick inspection of the clumsey dwarfs belongings revealed a pair of patchwork socks 'one size fits all', a keg of cheap liquor and the most beautiful multicoloured amulet! she slot the amulet into her apron pocket as much as it would fit and fluttered toward the the stench
grendel slept back to a wall with his arms and legs spread like a beanie doll and his baby pigglet snores played games with his wispey nostril hairs. she felt a pang of guilt as she flew with all her might towards the sleeping anmial. her billhook implanted firmly into his forehead, the sudden jolt snapped her apron stings, tossing her onto its face.
the grendel, tim, dreamt of his childhood. of spearing mermaids in the lagoon with his dad, of his first kiss with the screaming shepards daughter and mostly of his mother who had gone out of her way to give him a propper education and balenced diet. he loved his mother more than anyone else in the world and it pained him to think that a once so gracefull and fragrent woman.. the most charming hostess in all the 10 kingdoms, had grown fat and solitery. sometimes he wondered what she did all alone in her burrow. slept he expected. dreaming of better times.. of him. he woke up with a spike in his head and a fairy clinging to his face.
thou pockets was no expert she has expected the billhook strike to have been quite fatal. upon seeing that it wasnt and that she was attached, foot in nostril, to a live grendel, she punched with all her might at the blubbery white of its eyes 'ouwwwwwwwwwwhh your hurting meeeeeee' was the beasts warcry as it blinked and tried to stumble to its feet. determined to press home her advantage, the bezerker fairy snarled and bit at a zit on the dirty grendels nose.. her teeth where sharp and found their mark
tim had gathered his senses just in time to see the the fairy knocked from his face by an errution of zit-puss.. she hovered inches from his face squeeling in disgust and trying to wipe clean her eyes and mouth with a decorative cooking apron. he swat at her, knocking her limp thou she some how mannaged to grab at one of the ropey hairs petruding from his left ear.. again there was a nip of pain but he felt no real danger for his life fromone so young. his hand came hammering against the side of his head leaving dead fairy gue between his fingers.
pockets knew that winning wasnt everything, and that if you tried yoru best and had fun then you ultimatly couldnt lose. she arived in valhalla just intime to be maid of honour at her sisters wedding to tom. after the ceromoney, the best gnome, 'toothless to my friends' swaggered over to her, fishing pole cast casuallyover his shoulder. she blushed and held his hand.